I first started drafting this post a couple of nights ago when my emotions were running high after a two hour battle to get Bella to sleep. No matter what we tried she was having none of it and was just generally being a bit of a madam. Eventually I shouted at her, like really shouted at her and told her to stop messing around and to just go.to.sleep. I instantly regretted it, the Mum guilt hit me like a tonne of bricks and of course I then felt bloody awful which resulted in me bursting into tears myself. Oh the dramaaaaaa. So this post was going to be all about how tough I have been finding Motherhood lately.
But then today happened. I heard some really sad news. A local personal trainer and his wife tragically lost their three year old son this morning after he had a seizure last night. I don’t know them personally and I don’t know all the details but I don’t need to. My heart literally broke for this family when I heard the news, I felt physically sick and I could feel hot tears stinging in my eyes.
Three years old. Just three.years.old.
I can’t even comprehend what this family is going through right now, but my heart aches for them.
Life can be so cruel and so so unfair.
The world is such a scary place lately, with so much tragedy and way too much heartbreak. But things like this, so close to home too, really put it all into perspective. Motherhood IS hard. But I wouldn’t change it for the world. I wouldn’t trade a single second with my girl for anything. She drives me absolutely bonkers some days but my god I love her more than I ever knew was even possible and every day spent with her is a blessing.
Tonight I laid in her bed and held her a little longer, cuddled her a little tighter and made sure she knew just how much I love her.
‘Hold her a little longer, rock her a little more, read her another story; you’ve only read her four, let her sleep on your shoulder, rejoice in her happy smile, she is only a little girl for such a little while’