Browsing Tag:

motherhood

  • InMama

    The Working Mum Juggle

    As a mother, I of course want to support and protect my babies as much as I possibly can. Whether they are with me or not, I am pretty much always worrying about them. Asking myself is they’re having fun, wondering if they are both getting on okay, and worrying whether they miss me as much as I miss them. (Spoiler; probably not, they’re too busy having fun!)

    The world is such a scary place and some days I do wish I could be with them all the time, holding their hand whenever they need me. But sadly this just isn’t realistic as Mama’s gotta go to work! I recently increased my hours at work and I’m now working four out of five week days. Which means I only get one day off during the week to spend with Hugo. I’ve been finding the adjustment pretty hard.

    Mainly cos it’s just so bloody tiring. Because of course it isn’t just getting up and going to work then coming home again at the end of your working day. THOSE WERE THEY DAYS. It’s now getting myself, Bella and Hugo up, ready, fed and out the door by 8.15am each morning by myself as Josh leaves for work before anyone else is usually even up. It’s then juggling dropping off two children in two different places within twenty minutes before then getting myself to work on time by 9am. It’s then the same after I finish too. Throw in ballet once a week, homework, packed lunches, reply slips, party invites, sorting the dog out, housework, washing, cooking and BLOODY HELL IT’S EXHAUSTING. And that’s before any kind of socialising, exercise or me time. There are literally not enough hours in the day!

    Something that is super important to me is being able to drop Bella off at school every day myself. Right from her first day at school I think I have done almost ALL of the morning drop offs. I am very lucky that my employers are pretty flexible and I’m able to start work later than everyone else to allow me to do this.

    One of the things I have found to be invaluable since working more is being as organised as I possibly can. I do the majority of prep the night before. I make Hugo’s packed lunch, pack my work bag and lay out Bella’s uniform and my clothes for the next day.

    My phone calendar is my SAVIOUR and I basically run my whole life from it. The notes app is also super handy for writing down things I need to remember to do. Other ones I use regularly are the Ocado and Sainsburys ones. I like to flit between the two but I just add things into my basket as and when we run out which makes food shopping much easier. I also recently signed up to an online pharmacy so I can manage my prescription from home rather that having to go into the doctors. It’s super easy to set up and you can reorder asthma inhalers, diabetes equipment along with all your regular medications too. Which is all really handy!

    I’m very lucky to have wonderful In Laws who have the children overnight for us a few times a year so we can get a bit of couples time in too. But even then I have to make sure the children have everything they need before I even start packing for myself. The longest we have ever left them for is three nights when we went to Budapest last year and Sweden in January. Both times we made them a countdown to our return that Bells could tick off and thankfully both times that were absolutely fine. I did miss them but I’m always a much better parent after some time out!

    Obviously I am not the only working mother out there. And many have more children and responsibilities than I do. But it’s hard. And it’s a juggle. And I’m not ashamed to admit that. I just try to tell myself that it IS worth it. It’s helping to instil a good work ethic into the children by them seeing the importance of Josh and I both working hard. And it means we can live a nice life now but also hopefully one day it’ll mean we can provide the children with a bit of a support buffer to fall back on when the time comes for them to navigate the big wide world by themselves.

    *Collaborative Post but all opinions are of course my own*

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  • InBella

    ‘And Though She Be But Little, She Is Fierce’

    I’ve having one of those weeks where I am most certainly do not feel like I am winning at Motherhood. My washing pile doesn’t seem to be going down, I have overslept twice this week and my darling daughter is testing every ounce of my patience and oh my god is it draining. It took her over two hours to finally decide that she would eat her dinner last night.

    TWO.FRIGGING.HOURS.

    I ended up missing my exercise class because of her dinnertime shenanigans and I was pretty hacked off about it all and so ready for her bedtime. But no, it didn’t stop there.  She then decided that she didn’t want to go to sleep either. And so fought that for probably another hour. When I told her that she was being naughty she replied with ‘but I want to be naughty’ I mean seeeeeeeriously kid!? Oh and this was after being a complete whinge bag all afternoon of course. She’s had epic meltdowns to the point that she wets herself for the last two consecutive days and I’m so over washing urine soaked clothes. SO OVER IT.

    Bella is ridiculously strong willed with absolutely everything. Sure, she’s always been a feisty little madam, but the older she gets the more determined she becomes. If she decides she doesn’t want to do something, it will take you some serious negotiation skills and nine times out of ten; bribery to get her to change her mind. She does not give in easily and will keep pushing until normally it all ends it tears… and sometimes those tears are mine!

    Being strong willed is not a bad trait to have by any means, it of course has many positives. Like, for example, when she’s trying to learn something new, she will persevere until she cracks it. Because most of the time, she just will not give in. She’s now a PRO at colouring in between the lines, yet if she accidentally colours outside those lines… she’s not going to happy be about it.

    A lot of the time she really is the most wonderful little girl to be around, she is funny and caring and she genuinely loves life most of the time. But if she’s in one of *those* moods and something upsets her, god forbid if you suggest it might be almost bed time or that she needs to actually eat a meal, then god help you. Well, me.

    I was only saying the other day that the so called ‘Terrible Twos’ haven’t been half as bad as I’d expected. But I wonder if maybe the ‘Threenager’ attitude may have arrived a month or so early and I genuinely fear for my mental stability if this is a taster of what’s to come!

    I said to my husband last night when we fiiiinally sat down to eat our dinner; ‘How is it possible to love someone SO much even though they drive you bat shit crazy some days?!’ Of course, he didn’t know the answer. But if anyone else does, please do let me know 😉

    Because that’s the thing with Motherhood isn’t it? They can drive you do the brink of insanity but at the same time you love them so much it hurts. 

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    Is this not just the cheekiest face you ever did see!!? 😉 

    Harriet XO

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  • InFamily

    Is There Ever A Right Time?

    My social media timelines are full to the brim with pregnancy announcements, gender reveals, beautiful baby bumps and photos of squishy newborn babes at the moment. And every time I see one, it has me feeling alllll the feels.

    About six months ago I wrote this post about how I was feeling broody and it’s safe to say that the feeling has definitely not gone away. I have babies on the brain, big time. I even wake up in the middle of the night and my thoughts are consumed by all things pregnancy and baby related. It’s actually quite crazy and probably a bit weird, especially as I’m not even expecting yet!

    I’m so desperate for all the excitement that pregnancy brings, all the planning, the last minute preparations, swooning over all those teeny tiny sleep suits. I try to remember what it’s like to feel those little kicks from the inside one day and then to cuddle your baby on the outside the next. I’m craving that intoxicating newborn smell and the adorable little noises and squeaks that new babies make. I’m longing for those night feeds, when the rest of the world is sleeping. I just can’t wait to experience it all once more.

    After Bella was born we made a five year and a ten year plan and so far we have stuck to them. Of course there has been bumps along the way and it hasn’t all been plain sailing but we’re now approaching the bit where we agreed to start thinking about adding a second baby to our family (eeeeeekkk). As I’m sure you can tell I am ecstatic about the thought of having another, but at the same time, I just can’t help but feel extremely anxious about the whole thing too.

    My heart is saying ‘YES, YES, YES’. My head however is being a bit more hesitant. Am I really ready? Will I cope with two children okay? How will we manage financially whilst I’m on Maternity leave? Is my heart big enough to love two babies? I also worry about the impact a new baby will have on Bella and how she’ll adjust to being a big sister. All these thoughts running through my head all day, every day are bloody exhausting.

    Deep down, In my heart, I know I’m ready. We’re ready. I’m sure all these worries are probably quite normal. Deciding to have another baby is such a big decision and one that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Although I think that, really, when it actually comes down to it, there is never going to be a ‘right’ time, there will always be something that could hold us back a little longer, but I suppose sometimes you just have to follow your heart, hope things will be fairly straight forward and prey that we can be that lucky.

    I’m not entirely sure why I’m writing this post, apologies if it’s a bit rambly, but I just felt like I needed to write my thoughts down. And hopefully I can look back at this post one day and realise that I needn’t have worried at all.

    Has anyone else ever felt like this? Do you think there is ever a ‘right’ time?
    I’d love to hear your thoughts.

    And of course, I had to share a couple of my favourite photos of Bella at just a few days old taken by the very talented Charlotte Rawles Photography.

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    Thanks so much for reading,
    Harriet xo

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  • InMama

    Toddler Tantrums & Toothpaste Kisses

    I’m not afraid to admit that Motherhood is not always a walk in the park (literally). When you become a parent you have to become completely selfless whether you like it or not. You don’t get ‘days off’ from being a Mama. It’s all consuming and sometimes it’s quite frankly draining. Of course I can’t deny that it’s the most rewarding job in the whole world but some days aren’t easy.

    Some days are good but some days are bad and some days you just need to write off all together and start again tomorrow. And that’s okay.

    Today (Sunday) was a ‘combination of all of the above’ kind of day. It was lovely but it started off rocky when Bella played up when we went out for a family breakfast with my dad, my sister and her family. She didn’t want to eat but she didn’t want to sit nicely either. She wanted to explore and let me tell you it was bloody hard work trying to stop her running riot in a busy garden centre.

    We then went and chose our tree which was all fine apart from the fact she point blank REFUSED to have her photo taken with me in front of the Christmas trees. The outtakes Josh took were highly amusing…Not.

    Bella helped decorate the tree nicely in between playing with her play doh at the dining table all whilst not so sneakily scoffing countless chocolates and dancing very cutely along to Christmas songs. Success.

    However, dinner was a complete and utter shitshow. This ‘phase’ of not eating much is starting to wear me down big time. It’s either one extreme or the other, she’ll either clear her plate and ask for pudding or barely eat a thing.  But of course she’ll eat absolutely anything and everything they give her at Nursery. SO.FRUSTRATING. Eventually we came to a compromise and she did eat half of her meal followed by a yoghurt.

    By this point we needed some quiet time so we finished the day with a lush bubble bath (for her, not me unfortunately!) and the devil child that was screaming the place down ten minutes previous was replaced with the sweetest little curly haired girl you’d ever met. Do you ever wonder if your kid’s trying to push you into an early midlife crisis? I bloody well do almost every single day.

    Bella was so sweet at bath time, splashing about in the warm pink bubbles and giggling away as we played peek a boo over the side of the bath. I quickly forgot about the dinner time dramas and grabbed my camera which she loved posing in front of and pulling her best ‘cheeeese’ face for.

    When it was time to get out I was fully expecting a minor meltdown and a few ‘no waaaaaaayyyy’s but surprisingly she happily obliged, we brushed her teeth and got ready for bed. Her infectious giggling continued as we headed upstairs and sat on the floor together to read a few bed time stories.

    She clambered all over me, wrapping her arms around my neck and squeezing me tight. She held my face so gently while smothering me with countless toothpaste kisses before I eventually tucked the crazy little whirlwind into bed. As I leant in and kissed her goodnight, she blew me a million kisses and I thought my heart may just fly out of my chest. I left her bedroom holding back big fat happy tears.

    Yes, it’s hard, and of course it’s testing at times but my god it’s always so worth it. For those little moments that make your Mama heart actually hurt because you didn’t know it was even possible to love someone so small so very much.

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