My social media timelines are full to the brim with pregnancy announcements, gender reveals, beautiful baby bumps and photos of squishy newborn babes at the moment. And every time I see one, it has me feeling alllll the feels.
About six months ago I wrote this post about how I was feeling broody and it’s safe to say that the feeling has definitely not gone away. I have babies on the brain, big time. I even wake up in the middle of the night and my thoughts are consumed by all things pregnancy and baby related. It’s actually quite crazy and probably a bit weird, especially as I’m not even expecting yet!
I’m so desperate for all the excitement that pregnancy brings, all the planning, the last minute preparations, swooning over all those teeny tiny sleep suits. I try to remember what it’s like to feel those little kicks from the inside one day and then to cuddle your baby on the outside the next. I’m craving that intoxicating newborn smell and the adorable little noises and squeaks that new babies make. I’m longing for those night feeds, when the rest of the world is sleeping. I just can’t wait to experience it all once more.
After Bella was born we made a five year and a ten year plan and so far we have stuck to them. Of course there has been bumps along the way and it hasn’t all been plain sailing but we’re now approaching the bit where we agreed to start thinking about adding a second baby to our family (eeeeeekkk). As I’m sure you can tell I am ecstatic about the thought of having another, but at the same time, I just can’t help but feel extremely anxious about the whole thing too.
My heart is saying ‘YES, YES, YES’. My head however is being a bit more hesitant. Am I really ready? Will I cope with two children okay? How will we manage financially whilst I’m on Maternity leave? Is my heart big enough to love two babies? I also worry about the impact a new baby will have on Bella and how she’ll adjust to being a big sister. All these thoughts running through my head all day, every day are bloody exhausting.
Deep down, In my heart, I know I’m ready. We’re ready. I’m sure all these worries are probably quite normal. Deciding to have another baby is such a big decision and one that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Although I think that, really, when it actually comes down to it, there is never going to be a ‘right’ time, there will always be something that could hold us back a little longer, but I suppose sometimes you just have to follow your heart, hope things will be fairly straight forward and prey that we can be that lucky.
I’m not entirely sure why I’m writing this post, apologies if it’s a bit rambly, but I just felt like I needed to write my thoughts down. And hopefully I can look back at this post one day and realise that I needn’t have worried at all.
Has anyone else ever felt like this? Do you think there is ever a ‘right’ time?
I’d love to hear your thoughts.
And of course, I had to share a couple of my favourite photos of Bella at just a few days old taken by the very talented Charlotte Rawles Photography.
Thanks so much for reading,